Health Clubs: Things that annoy me

I mistakenly signed on the proverbial dotted line. I was then trapped in a gym membership for three years at $100 a pop (per month)!

But the costs could have been easily forgiven had it not been for the following annoyances:

(1) The crowds. Could barely get near a machine, let alone use it during “peak” times, particularly after work (5pm and later).

(2) The childish “sign-up” sheets, like we’re in kindergarten. Yes, you have to waste precious work-out time by signing up in advance to take an exercise class or use cardiovascular machines (especially treadmills, ellipticals, and stairclimbers). Plus, the scheduled time slots for machines have short, 30-minute *limits* on them! That’s right. The moment you get on a machine, some other club member has their hawk eyes on you, counting the minutes until you get off the machine! The only available cardio machine which gymgoers seldom use are stationery bikes. Face it, we could all get stationery bikes at home for dirt-cheap prices instead of paying the premium prices of a health club membership.

(3) Gymgoers *hogging* up the machines exceeding their alloted scheduled times on the machines, causing all other members who show up on time to have less time to use the machines…

(4) The *long, long* – did I say long? – waiting line to shower. Dripping with sticky, hot sweat, you will have to wait on a longest line ever to wash up in the twenty or so stalls. If you’re a woman, there is an even longer line to use the bathroom.

(5) Lack of hygiene. Some club members are negligently unsanitary. They do not wipe off their dirty perspiration reeking from their buttocks, underarms, legs, and hands from the machines. You’ll be shocked at the germs that accumulate on the handlebars of the machines and the padded seats of the stationery bikes…and the showers and bathrooms. In fact, a friend of mine who also went to the same club got a foot fungus which required medical treatment because she had forgotten to wear sandals into the shower!

(6) Stinky, smelly locker rooms. The stench is unbearable even when the housekeeping staff spray Lysol disinfectant all over to try to cover the stink up.

(7) Men checking out the women and sizing them up as if women are sex objects. I’ve even heard that we are considered “meat” at a market. A few times some men even dropped their business cards into my machine drink holders while I was running on a treadmill! Listen, it’s a health club, not a pick-up joint!

(8) Conversely,